Thursday, October 22, 2009

Nostalgia

























I sat at the Finneytown chorus concert tonight with my high school best friend and reflected on how much I loved high school. I had amazing friends in high school. I got to participate in a million different activities. I was the cheerleading captain one night and the star of the musical the next.

Sometimes I sit in the same classrooms I was in, and try to pick out which of my friends are like the kids there now. I have an Adam Stein; he was an easy one to identify. A Nick Judge and an Eric Smith. I've found Jenna and myself. It's funny because while I love my life now, there was just something so simplistic about high school that you never really appreciate while you're there. Your friends are just there every day. You have more activities to choose from than you could ever need. The pressures of homework are nothing compared to real job anxiety. Little did we know; little did we believe.

More disheartening then the realization that I started high school ten years ago, is watching the kids in the high school now and the choices they make. I don't understand them. (Granted, my friends made decisions I didn't understand, but that's what happens when you're the naive one.) Why would you risk losing something you love for something that isn't that important? Why would you make rash decisions that could cost you in the long haul? And the worst part is when their parents, so eager to defend their kids, enable the bad decisions.

Where have the good 'ole days gone?

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Tired

I'm exhausted. I have run myself ragged and cannot seem to get an escape. Even lounging doesn't diminish the stress of the exhaustion. Yes, stress of the exhaustion. Because there is no end in sight. There's no, well it's only a few more days until the weekend. The weekend is actually the most stressful part.

I'm tired of trying to make people want more. I want to throw up my hands and say fine. Enjoy being miserable when you could have better. Fine. Good luck in life with your I never have to follow up on my commitments philosophy. Fine. But I'm finished. I can't convince you to be respectful or to not be entitled. I can't make you want better.

But I do want better. I want the calm after the storm. But it's not as if there's even a storm. Just a crazy name on the news and no milk at Kroger. Can't I just have better? Can't I just have more?