Gratitude

This was in my drafts because I started it long ago and never finished it. (slightly ironic if you read it, but if I remember correctly my computer died.)  It's extra special to me now, as I looked over the pictures I had chosen and had yet to write about, because Bertie is one of them.  She was and will always be a treasure.  Enjoy...


The new rooms and I are working on holding each other accountable to spending time with Jesus. So when I tried to wimp out on hang out time because I'm a grandma and want to go to bed, she called me on it.  So my "assignment" tonight it to write things that I am thankful for.  She told me three, but I like to think I can come up with more than that, so here are four.

My girls

I am beyond amazed every time I get to share the gospel with these girls.  I love it because they are at an age where they are so vulnerable and so real.  They are willing to open up their lives and share the good, the bad, and the ugly.  I have learned so much about God and his heart for us by spending time with these girls.  They make me laugh and they make me cry.  I laugh with them and I weep for them.  I am so thankful that the Lord allows me to be a part of ministry at Finneytown.

Cat Wade

When I was a pesky, pious, youth group kid she spent time with me.  She challenged me to better and to more.  She showed me what it looked like for a woman to love the Lord enough to give up her life.  If there is anything good in me as a leader, it is because I followed Cat Wade, following Christ.  And I continue to get to call her my friend.

Grams (Bertie)

I'm not sure I can get much down right now, because I have already started crying, but this woman is amazing.  She taught me how to enjoy life, how to spend intentional time with people, how to laugh, how to love unconditionally and relentlessly, how to be fair.. I could go on for pages.  For those of you that don't know, my grams passed away about two weeks ago.  She had been fighting cancer since the spring and we all got to spend lots of time with her this summer; it was wonderfully bittersweet.  My aunt Amy and I got to share a special moment with her this May in the hospital.  Everyone had just left and the three of us sat there.  She summed up Paul's thoughts when she said she was torn.  She so wanted to stay and be with all of us (there are 25 between kids/grandkids) but "I just want to be with Cliff and my Jesus."  Of course tears flowed at the moment, but in that moment I wanted that so badly for her.  The assurance when she said MY Jesus.  I think it's why I haven't cried much about it.  It would seem selfish to cry.  She finally gets to be back with the man I got to call my grandpa, AND she gets to hang out with Jesus.  Her Jesus.  That one word has resonated in my mind all summer.  Because I want to call him mine. (and I am thankful that he calls us his.)

Parentals

I'm spoiled rotton. My parents are amazing. And hilariously, this picture sums them up perfectly.  My mom is an extravert.  She'll make friends with anyone.  Super friendly.  And once you're friends, you're friends for life.  She would do anything for you.  Dad loves the background.  We jokingly call him a hermit.  But he loves to just support; to encourage.  They have taken so seriously the call on their lives to make disciples; because I know they are why Sara and I know and follow the Lord.  

Walking on Water

I had a realization a few weeks back that we all have opportunities in our lives to walk on water.  God presents us with opportunities that are, by all means, impossible.  Things that the world (and common sense) tells us shouldn't work.  Maybe you're making it by financially on an amount of money that seems too small, for example.  When we keep our eyes on Jesus, He makes the impossible, possible in our lives.  I use that as an example, because it's how he's been allowing me to walk on water since leaving teaching.  Life shouldn't work as easily as it has.  And i'm not saying I walk on water because he just deposits cash in my accounts. (although should he choose to go that route, I will not argue) Instead he puts things in my life that are atypical; roommates who want little to no rent. A sister who loves to take me out to eat. Random things in my life that I like to do on the side of my job that make good money (cupcakes, earrings, etc).  And as long as my eyes are on Him, it all works.

Sometimes though, the world is really loud.  If you remember from the account of Peter walking on water, you'll remember that he sinks at one point.  He gets distracted by the wind and the waves.  This wasn't a clear, pristine night.  I cannot imagine not being distracted.  The world was shouting that what he was doing wasn't possible.  He forgot who he was with.  Of course walking on water isn't possible for us; but it is for Jesus.  And because He's there, it is for Peter as well.  The world loves to shout at me that life shouldn't work.  That because my job isn't in my field of training or doesn't make enough or doesn't have enough hours, I'm doing something wrong.  Or I'm not good enough.  The world is good at being loud; it's good at distracting us and reminding us that what we're doing isn't possible.  That's when I freak out and apply for 10 jobs in one sitting; jobs that also have nothing to do with my training, or even things I enjoy.  I panic and forget that this isn't impossible for Him.

When we keep our eyes on Jesus, we get to walk on water.  I think that's worth getting out of the boat.